I got nothing. This post is boring.

April 21, 2009 at 11:03 am (boring)

That’s not entirely true, I have 422 unread blog posts waiting for me in my google reader. Gah! But, I have no coherent, blog-length piece of interest, so instead here’s a bunch of little things that have been floating around in my head.

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I’m worried that when I become a teacher I’m going to get all boring. See, it’s already starting ’cause I don’t even know how to flush that out into a full, sarcastic piece of awesomeness. I blame it on how lonely and depressing my current job is.

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This is what I had to put up with while studying for my mad teaching test:
img_1166bPeaking over my computer (on which I was actually trying to concentrate, because I was on a conference “webinar” about how to prepare for the scary test) is Cockzilla. I met Cockzilla back in college Chemistry I, when Dr. FianceeHusband and I were past the “oooo, naked!” phase and in that “ok, penises are actually pretty funny” phase. Dr. FianceeHusband liked drawing crazy things on my notes when we had classes together, and one day Cockzilla was born. I don’t think I have any old pictures of him any more, but back in Chemistry Cockzilla would terrorize cities all over my notes. He’s the size of a skyscraper, you see, and could spew fire and possibly other things. Since we haven’t had any classes period in over two years, I hadn’t seen much of Cockzilla in a while, but as I was asking a question over the phone to the person who would eventually become my mentor in this teaching program, I looked up and there he was, peaking over my screen. Also I think it’s pretty funny how there’s a guy parachuting away from Cockzilla on Dr. FianceeHusband’s shirt. Awesome.

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Kiwi is ready to run for president.
img_1169b1
See, he’s already hiding documents (under his furry butt) and being bribed with toys. And his face just screams “would I lie to you? Oh yes, I would, but it’s cool, I’m a good ‘ol Texan politician!” Kinda like LBJ, but furry.

img_1170b
“No pictures! I did not steal that food! What is your definition of the words ‘barfing up hairballs?’ I’ve never even been to an airport bathroom!” See, he’s totally ready.

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I have finally decided what my favorite food is. I know, that’s sorta weird but hey, consider the source, people. I love tomato bisque. Holy crap, I could and have lived on it. Dr. FianceeHusband hates it, but he’s going on his yearly field season trip in a few weeks, during which time I plan to buy a huge loaf of french bread, several jars of my favorite bisque, and lock myself in my apartmennt with the cats and old x-files episodes. If I had a prostate, it would be the healtiest prostate in the damn world. It would make all my other, non-lycopene needing organs jealous.

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I am supposed to be off in a dungeon of a lab, stuffing estrogen into tubes for a lab that doesn’t even like us and yells at us a lot. Instead I’m blogging and having a mild panic attack about the enormity of what I have gotten myself into with the whole teaching thing. I’m suppposed to interview for jobs before I’ve even started learning how to teach?? What the frick?!? Scary, scary, scary…

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Thus concludes this boring post. Sorry, readers. At least you got to meet Cockzilla…

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