Dear Funk: Fu*k you

April 21, 2009 at 5:01 pm (dear universe)

I am so over you, funk. You tried to beat me down, and succeeded for a while, but this girl cannot be stopped. I have way too much stuff to do what with quitting and not having a job this summer and learning how to teach, on top of crafting my freakin’ ass off to get all the crazy out of my head. I’ve always hated those stories about the girl who is just slightly not strong enough to handle stuff, so she has to wait and have someone rescue her. Well, f-that, buddy. I’m tired of waiting and I’ve always assumed that “holding out for a hero” song that I love so much was more about someone holding out so that I could come rescue them, rather than me waiting around for life to turn around. I look freakin’ hot in a cape, people. So no more wah-wah, poor me, poo poo crap, time to tie on the cape and get on to the ass-kicking. I think my lovely E was right when she said my current job was giving me Stockholm syndrome. Well, screw that, my head already has enough wrong with it as is. My coworkers don’t give a crap about me? Well, I don’t care, I’m leaving them all anyway. I’m going to go somewhere where I’m not just needed, but a hero to people that I will see everyday. I’m going to have to make capes to go with all my outfits…

Hiiiiiii-yaaaaa!

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dear universe,

January 19, 2009 at 9:23 pm (dear universe, work shmork) (, )

Ok, universe, the last of my interviews from my mad application flurry is tomorrow, so let’s try to get this one right, hmm?

Actually, I’ve basically given up on the job market. I’m going to work in ratty hell for the rest of my life, or at least until my boss retires. Then I’m extra screwed. The good news is that she’ll probably never retired, because she keeps getting tons of awards and grants and stuff. The bad news is that my rat allergy seems to be even more powerful than most of my allergy meds- the exception being benedryl, but my boss tends to appreciate me more when I am actually awake at work…

I decided it might be a good idea to look up the details for the job I’m interviewing for tomorrow (because seriously, there have been a millions it seems, which in real life numbers is 50), and found out it’s actually a job I would enjoy- environmental specialist agent- which of course means I totally won’t get it. Way to think positive, me! But really, would it end up being a job where I start out totally loving it, and then end up being totally disillusioned by society through it? Probably.

Think good thoughts for me anyways, universe! It makes me sad that I can’t hang out with the cool people at work because the less cool people then bitch about it to the boss, who them writes me up as being “unprofessional” for no real reason! Plus this job involves exercise, which I need!

love,
Megan

PS. I can’t figure out either how to turn categories off or how to take off the tags I tried out, so instead it looks like I am stupid or OCD or something. Whatever. Really I’m just too lazy to look it up.

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